5 Ways to Redefine Success So It Actually Feels Like Success

Because checking all the boxes isn't success—living with joy is.

Let’s be honest—most of us have been fed a pretty stale version of success. Work hard. Check all the boxes. Chase the next goal. Repeat forever. But if you’re anything like me (and I’m guessing you are), you’ve had that moment where you’ve done all the things and still felt unfulfilled.

Why? Because success isn’t about a never-ending checklist of “shoulds” handed to you by society, your boss, or your high school guidance counselor. Real success? It’s about joy, growth, and alignment with what truly matters to YOU.

Imagine this: You’re no longer hustling for someone else’s version of "making it." Instead, you’re living in a way that feels deeply, truly successful on your terms. No more chasing the moving finish line. No more measuring yourself against other people's milestones. Just pure, unfiltered joy and fulfillment in your every day.

That’s what we’re talking about today.

This blog is going to walk you through five ways to redefine success so it actually feels like success—and not just looks like it on paper. We’re not playing small here. We’re flipping the script, taking back the pen, and writing a story where YOU are the main character (not just a supporting role in everyone else’s saga).

Get ready to celebrate, grow, and shake up your entire definition of "success." Because once you see success in a new way, you’ll start noticing that you’re already living it—you just need to recognize it.

• Focus on the Process, Not Just the Outcome

If success is only measured by hitting the finish line, then you're missing out on the beauty of the entire race. So many of us live in that "I'll be happy when..." mindset. When I get the promotion. When I lose 10 pounds. When I buy the house. But guess what? The minute you achieve that goal, there’s another one waiting, and you’re right back to chasing.

Instead of tying success to the final result, shift your focus to the process. What are you learning? How are you growing? Who are you becoming? These are the real wins that build long-term fulfillment.

Consider this: If you’re training for a marathon, success isn’t just about crossing the finish line. It’s about all the early mornings, the discipline to train on days you didn’t feel like it, and the mental strength you’ve built along the way. THAT’s success. The finish line is just the cherry on top.

And let's be real, the process is where the magic happens. It’s where you discover what you’re made of. It’s where you learn to pivot, persevere, and problem-solve. Success isn’t just a destination—it’s a journey with twists, turns, and growth points that you can’t predict. If you’re only focused on the outcome, you miss the richness of the ride.

Think about the biggest transformations in your life—maybe it was going back to school, starting a family, or building a business. Sure, the "end result" was important, but wasn’t it also about the friendships you made, the challenges you overcame, and the confidence you built along the way?

Here’s a perspective shift: If success is only at the finish line, you’re essentially telling yourself that 99% of your time doesn’t matter. Spoiler alert: It does.

Try This: Journal every week about one thing you’ve learned in the process of working toward a goal. Celebrate that progress, not just the final outcome. This small shift can make you realize you’re succeeding every single day—not just at the end of the journey.

2. Redefine Success Based on YOUR Values, Not Society’s

News flash: Society’s definition of success is not the only one—and honestly, it’s often garbage. We’re told success means fancy titles, luxury cars, big houses, and 6-figure paychecks. But none of those things guarantee happiness, fulfillment, or joy. So, why are we chasing them?

It’s time to move the bullseye. Your success should be based on YOUR values, beliefs, and purpose. If freedom is one of your core values, then success might mean having the flexibility to work from anywhere. If family is one of your values, then maybe success means having time for unhurried dinners with your loved ones. Your version of success does NOT have to look like anyone else’s.

Take a moment to think about how much of your "success checklist" is truly yours versus what’s been handed to you by society, family, or social media. Are you chasing things because you want them or because you’ve been told you should? Here's the deal: Success should feel expansive, not restrictive. If the version of success you’re chasing makes you feel trapped, it’s time to rethink it.

Here’s the kicker—when you define success for yourself, you’re far more likely to feel fulfilled. Why? Because you’re chasing what actually lights you up, not someone else’s checklist. Success might be as simple as more rest, more joy, or more time with loved ones. Or it might be as big as running your own business or moving to a new city. The key is, it’s yours to define.

Try This: Ask yourself, "What does success look like for ME, at this stage of my life?" Write it down in vivid detail. Is it about peace, freedom, or creative expression? If you’re measuring success against someone else’s checklist, you’ll always feel like you’re behind.

3. Celebrate Your Wins (Yes, ALL of Them!)

Can we stop glossing over our wins like they’re no big deal? You’re out here accomplishing things that your younger self DREAMED about, and yet, you’re like, "Cool, what’s next?" No. Pause. Breathe it in. CELEBRATE IT.

Jenny’s Rule of Champagne: When I signed a major client, myself and my team popped 3 bottles of champagne. One bottle when the client showed interest, one when they gave a verbal yes, and one when they signed the contract. Imagine if you did that in your own life? Why wait for the "final" moment to celebrate?

Here’s the truth: When you don’t pause to acknowledge your progress, you’re training your brain to only chase bigger goals without appreciating what you’ve already done. And guess what? That’s the fast track to burnout. So start celebrating. Dance in your kitchen. Pop a bottle. Give yourself a moment (or 3) to bask in your own greatness.

Big wins deserve big celebrations, but small wins deserve them too. Did you finally tackle a task that’s been on your to-do list forever? Celebrate it. Did you make it through a tough week without losing your cool? Celebrate it. Did you keep a promise to yourself, no matter how small? Yep—celebrate that too.

Try This: At the end of every day, write down 3 wins—big or small—from your day. Celebrating the small wins trains your brain to recognize success, not just chase it.

4. Micro-Celebrations Are the Secret Sauce

You know how people celebrate weddings, promotions, and birthdays like it’s the Super Bowl? Why not do that for the micro-wins too? If you’re only celebrating the "BIG" wins, you’re missing 99% of your opportunities to feel successful.

Here’s the truth: Micro-wins build momentum. Every small win sends a signal to your brain: I’m capable. I’m winning. I’m making progress. You don’t need to wait for the "I’ve arrived" moment to feel successful. Instead, celebrate the fact that you’re showing up every day and moving forward, even if it’s just one step.

When you only celebrate the big wins, you’re teaching your brain that success is rare, elusive, and hard to reach. But when you celebrate the small wins, you’re telling your brain that progress is happening all the time. And here’s the wild part — your brain LOVES that positive feedback loop! It craves it. The more you celebrate, the more you build internal motivation to keep going. It’s like putting a reward system on autopilot.

Think of it this way: If you’re waiting for the “big win” to pop the champagne, you’re missing out on so many joyful moments. Why not celebrate the fact that you sent that email you were procrastinating on? Or that you drank your water goal for the day? Or that you kept your cool during that wild Tuesday meeting when everyone else was losing it?

Here’s a perspective shift: Success is not a single, shining moment. It’s a series of small choices that stack up over time. The choice to start, to keep going, and to push past doubt. Each of those micro-choices deserves to be acknowledged.

How to Build Your Micro-Celebration Practice (And Actually Enjoy the Process!)

When was the last time you gave yourself a pat on the back? If you’re like most of us, probably not often enough. That’s where micro-celebrations come in—they’re a game-changing way to stay motivated, build confidence, and make progress feel amazing. Let’s dive into four fun and easy ways to create your micro-celebration practice, including a fan-favorite: the Bingo Card Method.

• Create a “Micro-Win Jar”

Think of this as a time capsule of your awesomeness.
Here’s how it works:

• Every time you achieve a small win (and yes, sending that email you’ve been dreading totally counts), write it down on a slip of paper.
• Drop it into your Micro-Win Jar.
• At the end of the month, take a few minutes to open your jar and read through all the wins you’ve racked up.

Pro Tip: Turn it into a family or team tradition! Have everyone contribute their wins and celebrate together at the end of the month. You’ll be amazed at how uplifting it feels to reflect on all the progress—big and small.

• Use a Visual Tracker (Hello, Bingo Card Method!)

If you love seeing your progress in real-time, the Bingo Card Method is for you. It’s a playful and rewarding way to track your goals, and bonus—it turns your achievements into a game.

Here’s how it works:

1. Set Up Your Card
   Grab a blank 5x5 Bingo card template (you can draw one or download one online). Each square represents a small goal, habit, or milestone. For example:
• “Drink 8 glasses of water today”
• “Take a 15-minute walk”
• “Spend 10 minutes decluttering”
• “Send a tough email”
• “Journal for 5 minutes”
2. Leave the middle square as your Free Space because, let’s face it, sometimes showing up deserves a win!
3. Customize It for YOU
   Tailor the card to fit your life. You can focus on one area (like self-care) or mix it up with goals for work, health, relationships, and creativity. Bonus points if you color-code it for a little extra flair. 
4. Track Your Wins
   Each time you complete a task, mark off the corresponding square. Use stickers, highlighters, or whatever makes it feel celebratory.
5. Celebrate Your Bingos
   Every time you complete a row, column, or diagonal, shout “Bingo!” and reward yourself with a little treat. It could be a dance break, your favorite coffee, or guilt-free Netflix time. And at the end of the month? Aim for a fully completed card!

• Set “Celebrate It” Alerts

Sometimes, we just need a nudge to pause and reflect. Set a daily reminder on your phone that asks: What can I celebrate today?
This small, intentional pause can turn even the toughest days into opportunities to recognize your resilience. Feeling stuck? Here’s a cheat sheet:

• Did you show up for yourself today? (Yes? That’s a win!)
• Did you handle something hard with grace? (Definitely worth celebrating.)
• Did you keep going, even when it wasn’t easy? (Cue the applause!)

• Pair Wins with Simple Rewards

Who says celebrations have to be extravagant? Pairing your small wins with simple rewards creates positive reinforcement—and keeps you coming back for more.
Here are a few ideas:

• Take a 5-minute dance break.
• Snap a “yes, I did that!” selfie.
• Treat yourself to an extra-long bubble bath.
• Indulge in your favorite hobby guilt-free.

The trick is to create rewards that make you feel good without adding stress. Remember, this is about building yourself up—not breaking the bank.

Try This: Your First Micro-Win Celebration

Right now, take 60 seconds to think of one micro-win from today. Maybe you:

• Woke up earlier than usual.
• Tackled that annoying email.
• Took a breath before reacting in a tough situation.

Now, celebrate it! Stand up, smile, do a little happy dance, or say out loud, “I crushed that!” Feels good, right?

Why Micro-Celebrations Matter
These tiny moments of recognition create momentum. They train your brain to focus on progress instead of perfection and to appreciate the journey—not just the destination.

So, grab your Micro-Win Jar, print out a Bingo card, and get ready to make progress feel incredible. You’ve got this—and you deserve to celebrate every step of the way. 🎉

5. Reframe "Mistakes" and "Failures" as Tuition

Mistakes aren’t failures—they’re tuition payments for your growth. If you’re learning from them, they’re not wasted experiences. Let’s stop treating "failure" like it’s a shameful thing. It’s not. It’s an invitation to learn, pivot, and grow.

Here’s my perspective on mistakes: Every mistake is like paying for a semester of business school. When something takes longer than expected, costs more than you budgeted, or flat-out flops, I’ll say to myself, "That was just some tuition for my growth." Suddenly, the mistake isn’t a dead end—it’s a class you’re taking in the School of Life.

Mistakes teach us what success never will. Success often reinforces what we already know, but mistakes push us to re-evaluate, re-strategize, and sometimes, reinvent ourselves. They show us what’s not working, and more importantly, they shine a light on what could work next time.

Try This: When you make a mistake, ask yourself, "What’s the tuition for this lesson?" Write down 1-2 takeaways you’ll apply moving forward. Then, thank your mistake for showing you what needed to be learned.

Here’s the real deal: Success isn’t something you chase—it’s something you create. It’s not a finish line you cross, but a journey you design. When you redefine success on your own terms, it stops being an elusive target and starts becoming an everyday reality.

So let go of society’s checkboxes and start making your own. Celebrate your wins—big and small. Savor the process, because that’s where life happens. Value the lessons your mistakes teach you, and never forget to define your success by what matters most to YOU. This is your life, your story, and your definition of success.

You’ve got this—and you’re already more successful than you think. Keep going, keep growing, and keep creating a life that truly lights you up.